Dead Men Walking

After last week, I'm surprised that any of the boys had any of the cojones left to even show back up this week. Hell, I barely came back. In fact, I don't even care enough to remember anyone by their actual name. It's more fun this way.

First up is Chris Daughtry and Ed Kowalczyk's love child. Did you know he was in the Navy? They almost let us forget for a second. He's better this week, I guess...

Caterpillar brows made me fast forward through Marvin. He should be shot.

Dancing Queen is taking on a little Michael Buble. Now Michael is no sex god himself, but this song is all sex. And this performance was about as sexy as Dick Cheney.

Oh man. I felt like I was watching the beginnings of the second coming of another Little Michael Jackson and NOT in a good way. Hide your children folks.

Jack Osbourne did good tonite. For a second I almost started to like this show again.

Oh wait. Nevermind. Ambien Boy just killed that sentiment. I bet he cries after sex.

Ok, this is like ping pong. I kinda like this show again. My little Beat Box Boy is back in full effect. I LOVE Jamiroqui. But as my friend kindly pointed out, his ass looked fat. Oh, big ass boys are NOT cute.

Sniff Sniff. Nana dedications get me right here. AND a brilliantly executed version of Time After Time. I can't hate. Dayum, I hate when that happens. You go boy. SHUT UP RANDY! You too Simon (though I still love you)

Ok, another Nana dedication. But this time its by the Jay Tee Wanna Be. Loose the shtick already. How much clearer do I have to be about it. Smaller words. Slower speaking. What will it take. Hmmm, I guess I can hate afterall.

Sunshine Goatie Boy is a one hit wonder. Why must we be subjected to him week after week. And what's up with the judges? When did mediocre become good enough.

Bottom of the Heap (of crap)
Nick
Sundance
Jared

I'm tired. My head hurts. I'm going to bed hoping that when I wake up Bobby Ewing will tell me that this has all been a bad bad dream.